Despite what some psychologists claim, you are not your habits. Habits are patterns of behavior composed of three overlapping components: knowledge, attitude and skill. And since these are learned rather than inherited, habits are literally “second nature”-not first.
It’s a key distinction. Much of what we achieve in life depends upon the habits we cultivate. In school, on the job or during a job hunt, solid work habits are crucial. But we make and break our habits. We need not be victims of conditions or conditioning. Habits of effectiveness can be learned, habits of ineffectiveness unlearned.
Successful people daily weave seven habits of effectiveness into their lives. These habits are interrelated and sequential. The first three lead from dependence to independence and mutual benefit. The seventh habit sustains the growth process.
Habit 1
Initiative - Choose Your Course
The first habit, initiative, means taking personal responsibility for our actions and attitudes. It’s instructive to break the word “responsibility” into two parts: response/ability. The self-motivated person develops the ability to choose his response - making him more a product of his decisions than his conditions, more a product of values than feelings.
Behavioral scientists have built reactive, stimulus-response models of human behavior based on their study of animals (and neurotic people). Relatively little research has been conducted with healthy, creative people who exercise the freedom to choose their response to internal or external stimuli or conditions.
We exercise this freedom whenever we take initiative. The key is to be a leader, not a judge; a model, not a critic; to feed opportunities, starve problems; and to focus on our immediate circle of influence, not on our circle of concern.
Habit 2
Creativity - Begin with the End in Mind.
All things are created twice: first mentally and then physically. The key to creativity and duality is to begin with the end in mind - with a vision and a blueprint of the desired result. The first creation requires us to clarify values and set priorities before selecting goals and going about the work. Effective people excel at this. They establish their own standards.
They innovate. Ineffective people allow old habits, other people and environmental conditions to dictate this first creation. They adopt values and goals from their culture and see themselves in the “social mirror.” Often they climb the proverbial ladder of success, only to find later that the ladder was leaning against the wrong wall. While they may have achieved their goals, what they got wasn’t what they expected or really wanted.
The second, or physical, creation follows from the first, as a building follows from a blueprint. If the first creation - the design - is done well, the second creation - the construction - is faster and better. Quality cannot be inspected into a product. It must be designed and built in from the beginning.
Habit 3
Productivity - Prioritize, Organize, Perform
Productivity is a measurement of output over time, and the key principle of time management is to put first things first. We can then organize and perform activities around priorities and goals.
The formula for increasing productivity may be abbreviated POP: prioritize, organize, and perform. Studies have verified that most (about 80%) of the desired results flow from a few (about 20%) “high leverage” activities. To leverage our time, we should devote less time to activities that are urgent but unimportant and more time to things that are important but not necessarily urgent.
Habit 4
Interdependence - Think Win - Win or No Deal
Businesses, like families, achieve greater effectiveness through the cooperative efforts of all those involved. Marriage and other partnerships require interdependence. Yet people often approach these relationships with a competitive, independent mentality. It’s like trying to play golf with a tennis racket - the tool isn’t suited to the sport.
“Win-win” is only one of six “tools” or mental attitudes commonly used in everyday negotiation and problem solving. Other options include “win-lose,” “lose-lose” and “win-win or no deal.”
To develop the habit of interdependence, we must focus on mutual benefit. Win-win thinking begins with a commitment to explore all options until a mutually satisfactory solution is reached - or to make no deal at all. It’s based on the belief that there is more than enough for all (the abundance mentality). People with scarcity mentalities - who think there’s only enough for the best - seek win -lose solutions. Effective people model the win-win principle in their relationships as well as their business dealings.
Habit 5
Empathy - Seek First to Understand
Empathy is the master skill for building win-win relationships. It’s based on a simple principle: seek first to understand, then to be understood. We all see the world not as it is but as we are. Each person’s mental map defines the territory uniquely. In my seminars, I often divide an audience in half and show one side a drawing of a young girl and the other side a drawing of an old lady. I then show everyone a composite illustration. Invariably, those who are conditioned to see the young girl see her in the composite drawing; those conditioned otherwise see the old woman. As people from both sides interact, they sometimes question the credibility (or sanity) of those who see it differently.
Most credibility problems begin with perception differences. To resolve these differences and to restore credibility, one must exercise empathy, seeking to understand the point of view of the other person. Hammering problems by probing is usually counterproductive.
Habit 6
Synergy - Value the Difference
Insecure people tend to make others over in their own image and surround themselves with people who think similarly. They mistake uniformity for unity, sameness for oneness. Synergy results from valuing differences, from bringing different perspectives together in the spirit of mutual respect.
People then feel free to seek the best possible alternative, often the “third alternative,” one that’s better than either of the original proposals.
Using the principle of synergy, a person may multiply his individual talents and abilities, making the whole greater than the sum of the parts. One plus one may equal more than two.
Habit 7
Consistency - Sharpen the Saw Regularly
In the fable of the goose that laid the golden egg, the farmer learns from sad experience that success has two sides: the goose, which represents production capability, and the golden egg, the production of desired results.
It’s wise to keep both sides in balance. And yet when people get busy producing or “sawing,” they rarely take time to “sharpen the saw” because maintenance seldom pays immediate dividends.
Consider, for example, the case of the ambitious manager appointed to supervise production in a fast-growing company. Anxious to receive another promotion as soon as possible, he pushes the plant and its people to the limit, day and night, while postponing scheduled machine maintenance to reduce costs and boost profits. He makes an impressive short term showing and is promoted to junior executive ranks of the company.
When his replacement steps in, the machines start to break down and people complain about being burned out. Vacations and downtime cause production and profits to drop dramatically. In the executive offices, people gripe about the new manager. His predecessor is the one to blame, however, for liquidating the company’s assets - human and capital - in order to achieve the quick fix.
On a personal level, this habit of sharpening the saw regularly means having a balanced, systematic program for self renewal in four areas: physical, mental, emotional-social and moral. If we fail to develop this habit, the body becomes weak, the mind mechanical, the emotions raw, the spirit insensitive